32. Get Shamed Into Fluency
"I won't retire until you pass the language test for French citizenship."
I've had the same French teacher for six years now, which makes it the longest relationship I've formed in Paris. She's been teaching French for over three decades, and she enjoys it very much — but she always tells me: "I won't retire until you pass the language test for French citizenship."
She's been using this threat on me for a couple of years now, and we recently decided that I will finally be taking this test in April or May of next year. The promise of French citizenship, the ability to vote, an EU passport: all of these are great, but none of them compelled me to get off my ass and finally begin the citizenship process. Guilt, shame, and a stern old woman's disapproval: that's what worked.
The first two years I lived in France, we would do lessons twice a week at her apartment, and it seemed more like a social gathering than a lesson because she'd serve tea and snacks and we'd spend the first 30-45 minutes gossiping before any grammar or vocabulary was taught. It was all very pleasant, and in that time, I probably learned the most French of my life.
Then the pandemic happened, and one of the few constants in my weekly routine were our French lessons, which still happened twice a week, but this time on Skype. By then, we were barely doing any language exercises, and instead, we would just talk about the small bubble of our lives during the confinement. At the time, I was pregnant and highly emotional, two conditions that didn't result in me expressing myself very clearly in French.
One week, I was trying to say something, and my teacher kept interrupting me to correct my grammar —as she should because that's, you know, her job— but I got frustrated, and said (in French), "Yes, I know, I am very stupid!"
She was taken aback by my reaction, but then corrected me: "It is better to say: Yes, I know, I am an idiot. There is a big difference."
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